Web MD

So obviously i like web Md. i have recommended some articles from their before. I was just reading one on causes of depression, and the final paragraph caught my eye. It said, "Some people have a clear sense of why they become depressed. Others don't. The most important thing to remember is that depression is not your fault. It's not a flaw in your character. It's a disease that can affect anyone -- and regardless of the cause, there are many good ways to treat it." I like how succinctly it expresses what i consider to be the basic concepts to keep in mind in regards to depression.
Sometimes just knowing you are depressed makes you feel more depressed. For a lot of reasons. You feel like you can't fight it. You feel ashamed. You think no one will ever love you and you will always be alone. Basically there are many diverse reasons to feel even more depressed. I think that if everyone understood the above summation it would really help. I know i am a great person, and that my depression is not my fault. Sometimes it is hard to believe that there will ever be a guy who will understand that enough to look past it and see me. If i knew that people actually understood depression, not in a judgy way, or in a condescending way, it would help me to feel better. I feel like i have to explain myself when i go awol, but at the same time like i can't. When i get really depressed i can disappear for a while. Sometimes it is a couple of hours, sometimes days. I hole up in my room, and try to work through what i am feeling, sometimes through numbing myself with a ton of TV. TV is not really a good option, but i turn to it time and time again. Books used to be my distraction of choice, but i don't own books i haven't read, and when i hole up i don't go to the library to get books. I have recently gotten into ebooks, so i can have access to lots of books from the comfort of my home. I need to leave, but being a pragmatic person i can't leave to just drive becasue that wastes gas, and i don't have somewhere to go, so i stay.